The average Brit spends £3418 a year on holidays.

What the actual fuckles.

£3418?!?

That’s like 45 pairs of Topshop boots.

Or a 2009 Vauxhall Corsa with tinted windows, body kit and some alloy wheels.

chelseacorsa
Nice rims mate

SHIT SON – that’s 682 Toby Carveries!

Whatever way you look at it, that is one huge lump of cash that I, as a holiday deal delving fiend, was shocked – neigh- OUTRAGED to discover.

Even if we were to say that half of that is spends, that’s still £1709 on travel and accommodation.

Therefore, I’ve decided to go ahead and commit to not getting engaged/housedup/babyfied for at least the next year (in the very, very least) so that I can see how many holidays I can do for the same price.

I know. What a bloody trooper.

chelsea-phelps
SOMEONE GIVE THIS GIRL A MEDAL (also Omega, hit me up with some sweet sponsorship again, thanx bbz)

Now, I’m not talking about slumming it – christ, Zante 2008 was enough to swear me off 2 stars for life – I’m just talking about getting the most for your money. After all, we all still want to look fancy as fuck on Instagram (AM I RIGHT LADS?!).

So first things first, we’ve got to have some rules.

For £1709:

  1. I’ve got go on at least 10 holidays
  2. Trips have to be 2 nights or more and two have to be 5 nights or more
  3. I can only use my 28 days of annual leave
  4. I’ve got to visit at least 3 continents
  5. I have to fly business class at least once

THAT’S TOUGH, RIGHT? (Again, what an absolute champ I am for taking on this grueling task, etc. etc.)

So, if you fancy seeing how I get on/how long it takes me to fall into a pit of inevitable yet totally instagrammable debt then get a pen, some paper and write down the name of this website. Oh, what wait- you’re not my gran? (Shit! More people than my gran are reading this!!). Well, you can just sign up for emails or press ‘follow’ to the right instead.

Next time, it’s all about finding holiday numero uno.

Yeah, I should really start looking at that…

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